You Know You're a HomeSchool Mom If....

I know, I know... the topic is SO overdone here on the 'net.  But each family has their own experiences, and this list has been growing in my head for a wee bit of time now.  So here goes my version:

You Know You're a HomeSchool Mom If...


1)  You find yourself talking in phonemes... All.  The.  /T/ /ie/ /m/.  The cashier at the grocery store and the bank teller look at you like you've grown a second head.

(Stock photo from e-teacherresources.com)

2)  It really didn't take that long to learn to ignore the stares and funny looks you get from the people who realize you have big kids out in public during the school day.

3) You have learned to stop correcting the people who have asked why your kids are not in school, and you told them you homeschool, and then they forget 2 minutes later and make comments like, "Ok, better get back to school!"  It just ain't worth it.

4)  The amount of recyclables you save for projects has increased tenfold.  Every few weeks you need to clear some floor space and dump out your overflowing boxes along with some glue and crafty stuff and declare that it's Art.  All day.  Until we have used up enough supplies to make the boxes fit back in the closet.

5)  You routinely make decisions that you know you'll later regret (like opening bags of playsand directly on your back patio that will just collect leaves and grit and need to be cleaned up by someone hopefully before it snows but probably in reality won't be) because you've convinced yourself of its fantastic educational value.

6)  Every time you remind your kids to choose a healthy snack, it turns into a 20 minute discussion, which you then mark off as "Health class."

7)  You thought doctor's appts and such would be less crowded during the day, but the waiting rooms are filled with a phenomenal amount of old people (the kind that are staring at you wondering why your kids are not at school) and you still have to wait.

(Stock photo, not my own!)

8)  You're learning so much that you wonder what the heck you ever got of your own schooling back in the day.  You sometimes excitedly tell other adults about these things, like life in Mesopotamia, or a trick to dividing fractions, and then realize that they don't care and just want you to shut up and talk about something normal, like the weather.

9)  You sometimes speak with people who know of someone who is/was homeschooled, and that homeschooled person "went to Harvard/is extremely well-mannered/won the Nobel Peace Prize/wrote a new version of the standard dictionary in 5 languages/insert other grand accomplishment here."  You learn to smile and say, "Hey, no pressure, right?"

10)  You've got a rhythm to your week...

                Day 1 - HomeSchool.  You cover 27 subjects and are still smiling and feel quite accomplished.

                Day 2 - Wake up grumpy because there is "School" all over your house.  Declare that no School is getting done until School is cleaned up!

                Day 3 - HomeSchool.  Your house is only half cleaned up from 2 days ago, but School must happen, so you muster through the most important subjects and then take everyone outside to read some History, conveniently choosing to just not look at the inside of your house.

                Day 4 - Laundry has announced that it is not going to fold itself and you haven't seen the bottom of the sink in days.  The kids make comments all morning under their breath about how Homeschool is not ChoreSchool, but you get some basics done and then sit your grumpy kids down to do School.

                Day 5 - Meet up with your homeschool group at bowling/the park/the firehouse/the arboretum/insert educational place here.  Smile and act like you have been entirely productive all week.

                Days 6 & 7 - Sometimes a little School happens, sometimes you just build and rebuild train tracks all day.

You reflect on your week and realize that you actually DID accomplish quite a bit, even though it maybe didn't feel like it at times.  You realize it was awesome to be with your kids for every little learning experience, and that you wouldn't trade it for anything.