4 Years Ago Right Now....

(And just so you're aware, RIGHT NOW is 11:46PM on July 6th, 2014)... so 4 years ago right now, I was JUST STARTING labor with the one that I swear was supposed to be born on her due date.  Since I've got to finish this in the next 12 minutes to even make sense timewise - I'll make it short.  Riley's Post will come later, but tomorrow is her birthday.

July 3rd she was due.  July 3rd I woke up in a puddle.  Not to be gross if you've never had kids, but we, Roger and me both, smelt the puddle.  It was NOT pee.  So we went to the Birth Center.

Duh, right?

One, two, three midwives tested me.  We're really not sure, they said.  But you're obviously not in labor, so off you go.

And we went.

Nothing.

Nada.

Zilch.

I walked.  I ate spicy.  I lifted cinderblocks.  Then I lifted and threw them.

Nothing.

July 4th - fireworks.

Nothing.

July 5th - went to work.  So pissed off at people who ask me, "Are you still here?!?"  "Yes, dumbass, and if you ask me again, I'll punch you in the face!"

My phone rings incessantly.

"Are you in labor?"  "Are you in labor?"  "Are you in labor?"  "Are you in labor?"  "Are you in labor?"

Gaaahhh.

July 5th - I fall asleep around 9pm and I wake up in a puddle AGAIN a few hours later. We both smelt the puddle, it is NOT pee.  I had two kids already and one was a standard bed-pisser.  I know what piss-bed smells like!

Off to the Birth Center again.

This time it tests like amniotic fluid.

But I'm not in labor.

And no fluid has leaked since that puddle. Her head is down on the hole in the bag and acting like a stopper.

Well, what the fuck now?

Go home.  Try to get in labor.  Call us back.  (Honestly, I friggin LOVE the Birth Center, midwives are the best!  But that right there, that above, is a darn frustrating thing to be told!)

We go home.  We finish packing.  Pack the car.  Roger is frantically putting up trim in the recently-finished (try yesterday) living room that has no furniture.

At 1pm we go to Chinese Acupuncture.

It sucked.

$75 for NOTHING.

I know I have only 24 hours since my water broke (or at least since it was recorded) until I have to go into the hospital to be monitored for risk of infection.

It's 4 pm. We have 7.5 hours to go.

Not a SINGLE contraction.

The midwives call me.  Castor oil?

Yeah, I don't like shitting much.  (Yes, that's what I told her.)

But they convince me.  It's the Poop Juice Shake or the hospital in a few hours.  Grab a shake on the way, let's do it here since this is your 3rd.  

I buy the peanut butter shake and mix it in and drink up.

Nothing happens.  NOTHING.

We play 500 Rummy for hours with our nurse, our midwife and the midwife-in-training.  The trainee is very excited, it's her first week catching.  

Still nothing happens.  

Okay, fine, not nothing.

I shit.  A whole lot.  But it's not bad like the internet said.  It's more mild than a bad stomach flu.

Then it's 11PM. 

Why don't you two lie down and get some sleep while I make some phone calls to the hospital?  

And I lay on the bed and cry because I don't want to go to the hospital.

I call my mom around 11:30.  Crying.

And as I lay there, I feel.... contractions.

They get bad fast.  I hang up the phone.

My midwive WAS off doing my paperwork for the hospital transfer... but then the other Mom there went into labor (strange thing, she and I were actually both in the same situation, approaching 24 hours and NOT in labor... the transfer they were arranging was for BOTH of us and hence it took more time... )

I start pacing the room through contractions.  They are coming hard and fast, 30 seconds from the get-go and getting longer and stronger.  

No one is checking on us, as they don't know I'm in labor.  I'm supposed to be sleeping so I can be rested for the fight I'm about to have with the hospital on how to manage me and my birth my transfer.  

It's 12:30am. Roger says, ummm, they're every 2 minutes.  Should I go get someone?

"NO!" I knew we were past the 24 hour mark, and I'll be darned if I was going to that hospital now.

The midwife sticks her head in to tell me the paperwork is almost done but we have to wait until the other Mom gives birth now, and she's so sorry to make me wait, and.... she stops when she sees me stop walking and waddling and wincing.  

"She's in labor, too!" she yells across the hall.  She checks me quickly, I'm at an 8.  

"Do I have to go to the hospital?" I ask.  "You ain't going anywhere!" was her answer.  

They are instantly in a pinch... the student midwife isn't allowed to attend alone, the other Mom and me are moving at the same pace, and policy states a nurse must be individually assigned to each Mom past 6 cm.  

They call for back-up.

The midwife comes in and says, "Ummm, you think you can hold off a little?  We got someone to come in, but I don't know how soon she'll be here."  

Then it gets really crazy.

Transition hits... both of us.  I can hear her across the hall.  And I can hear me over on my side of the hall.  

The midwife and nurse and the student all running back and forth.  It looks like something from the Three Stooges.

I'm ready to push, and I'm flippin tired, not really from being in labor, but from all that thinking-that-I-was-going-to-have-to-give-birth-in-a-hospital nonsense.  

I get on the bed and try to sit up as much as I can.  

I hear the other room sounds change from transition and pushing to happy-baby-mama-sounds.  

The back-up nurse comes flying in and so does the midwife and student.

I push and tell Roger to stand back.  "I know how to do this shit," I say to him.  And I hear the midwife and student burst into laughter.  

I push through the next 3 contractions and she is nearly there.  This shit hurts, so I am not wasting any time.  

Since there was a student, I get to hear all the talk about what-is-going-on.  Awesome.  I didn't really feel the Ring of Fire... until you said the word "FIRE."  Thanks a bunch.  

When her head comes out, the fluid that has been dammed up for a long time (my suspicion is that it DID actually break on the 3rd, but I guess we'll never really know...) gushes out and splashes on the floor.  

And Roger's shoe.  "I got ur shoe," I tell him, with a big grin on my face.

1 hour and 49 minutes after it started, I get another good contraction and Riley is born.  The student catches her.  I think it was her first.  She tells me later she hopes every client is just like me (except maybe for all that cussing, which, by the way, I DID apologize for... ) and that she had so much fun.  

Phew.  

I'm just freakin glad I didn't end up in the hospital.  It would've sucked for me, yes.  But boy, oh, boy, would it have sucked for anyone who got in my way.  

And now, I think I'll go get some sleep.  

'Cuz we got a big ole' 4 year old birthday to celebrate tomorrow! 

My Favorite Color of the Rainbow

Intelligent. Nice. Determined. Imaginative. Generous. Outgoing. 

Happy.  Social. Thoughtful. Creative.  Musical.  Girly.  

Great Big Sister.  Little Miss Helpful.  

My Indigo

The beginning - Due September 18th.  Swore I wouldn't "let" this one be late.  Didn't show till 4.5 months.  Measured small all along.  Lots (and lots) of extra ultrasounds due to my belly measuring small, but she was always 50th percentile.  Hot, hot, hot summer that year.  I would run my t-shirts under cold water and wear them soaking wet to stay cool.  The 18th came and went.  No sign of labor but at dinnertime on the 22nd I knew.  I checked my bags and went to bed early.  Contractions started 11:30PM.  Didn't want to get sent home like with Chase so I waited extra long to call the birth center.  Arrived at 4:30AM at 6cm.  Labored in tub.  Ready to push at 6AM.  I'm a pro at this, back up, I got it, there will be no wasted contractions while in the pushing stage! 

 5 days late, Friday, September 23rd, 2005 at 6:29AM.  6lbs, 14.5oz, 20 inches long.  Skinny little chicken leg girl. 

One Day Old

Baby Indy was a dream baby.  Ate, slept, cried very little, except when her big brother would throw tennis balls to Mom and Mom would miss.  Poor little head.  She only fit in preemie clothes for the first month.  Excellent nurser.  Slept through the night at 6 weeks.  Sat at 4 months.  I have no idea when she crawled but she walked 2 days before her 1st birthday.  She did however start talking at 8 months and by her birthday, was talking in sentences.  It was creepy and strange to see this little thing speaking so properly, barely walking, still a baby, really, but she was talking.  And she was grammatically correct.  Which creeped people out even more and astounded them at the same time.  7 years later, I might even think my memory was off, except I recently sat and watched old videos of her ON her birthday and in the months following.  Videos of her telling full JOKES.  Videos of her describing to my grandmother what we did at the library or the YMCA that day.  Videos of her talking about her toys in the bath, descriptively.  

I confess, I did actually buy these fairy wings before we confirmed she was a girl...

Little Ar-teest! 

We joke and say that Indy must've been a bard in a previous life, someone who's job it was to travel around the countryside and sing the news and tales of all happenings.  .  She sings.  Always has.  It came as soon as she could talk.  She sings her life.  Songs about cars passing by.  Which parts to wash in the shower.  Soap bubbles.  Friends.  TV shows and books.  Everything is subject matter for Indy's songs.  She doesn't know it, but I have a significant amount of video that includes just a standing shot of the sink in the bathroom, because I was recording her singing in the shower without her knowing it and without recording the shower cuz that's illegal.  At 8, she obviously showers herself now, but I went up the other day to see if she was done, and stood in the bathroom to listen to what the song sounds like now.  

She still sings.  And I love it.

Preschool years:  Dolls, trucks, purses and shoes.  So many Moms out there "push" their little girls to be girly, putting them in frilly little outfits with sparkly shoes.  I was fine with Indy wearing Chase's hand-me-down camo.  By 18 months, we'd pass the shoe section in a store and she'd stick her feet out and say, "Shoes for me please."  She'd always pick the sparkliest thing there was.  It made me barf in my mouth a little bit, but I'd get it for her.  She had a purse collection of fancy bags.  I still used my Army green slingover bag.  She wasn't getting this girly thing from me.  Accessories.  She had to have barrettes, bows, clips, bracelets, necklaces, rings, etc.

18 months

My First Tattoo

Wildwood Beach, NJ, age 2

3rd Birthday

Age 3

Boating on the Schuylkill River

Indy and Mom-Mom in 2009, age 4

Age 5-7:  First day of kindergarten, she came home and said, "I got my best friend."  Sure, ok.  Kids say funny things.  3 days later we met her best friend's parents, who said their daughter came home day 1 and said the same thing.  They are still in the same class and still BFF's.  But in the 3 years of school, these two girls have expanded their group.  They have a gaggle now, 7 girls who all hang together.  I call them the "Vowel Crowd" because they all have names that start with vowels, all 7 of them, except no one starts with "U!"  Indy excelled in K and 1st, getting high marks and flawless test grades.  Teachers say she always helps others and is a joy to have in class.  We tried soccer and dance, she liked the practice but not the game or performance.  She'd rather sit and watch Chase play.  

XMas '09

A new baby sis in 2010

First Day of Kindergarten

BFF's

6th Birthday

Epcot 2012

Meeting Mickey, age 6

XMas 2012, age 7

And now, age 8! - On her birthday, we had magical plans.  We'd get homework done and meet Dad and Avia up at Sweet N' Sassy to get her ears pierced (totally missed the boat when she was a baby!).  Then off for a special dinner of..... pizza.  Hey, it's her day.  Except the bus came, and the kid I babysit got off by himself.  What?? 

 "Where's Indigo?"  

"She didn't get off the bus."  

"WHAT?"  

Yeah, so apparently sometimes she's SO social, that she forgets to pay attention to what's going on around her.  After some phone calls, the bus driver came back around and dropped off a tearful little Indigo.  The bus driver even gave her a flashlight out of his bag so she "could always find her way home..."  And THEN we did homework, went to Sweet N' Sassy, got ears pierced, ate pizza and sang "Happy Birthday" over an ice cream sandwich.  A very magical evening indeed.  

Indy also took some friends to BounceU to celebrate her big 8 and they had ice cream cake later at the house. 

Currently:  Took violin for a year with the Suzuki method, a fast learner making beautiful music.  Just getting into baton.  We thought we sent her to a week of dance camp but it turned out to be actually Baton Twirling camp, and she loved it!  Picked it up like a rock star and now she's thinking about joining a competitive team.  Always planning playdates.  Loves being outside.  Earned the nickname "The Little Lawyer" from Mom as she always sticks up for her big brother no matter what and tries to make a plea deal with Mom to lesson his punishment, even if she is the one who got the raw end of the deal from him to begin with.  Plays "Mom" to the littles, always directing and meddling.  She's learning (slowly) to let them be themselves, make their own decisions, not to carry the baby around all the time (for this, he bites her).  

She has a contagious smile, a girly giggle, a stubborn streak.  Would sleep in every day if she could.  Reads all the time.  Always crafting.  Can do Rainbow Loom like she invented it.  Will do anything for her friends and family.  A fine daughter, indeed! 

Before ear piercing...

....And After! 

I'm Sexy And I know It....

Oh he thinks he's sexy alright!! 

Little Roger Jackson.  He had a birthday last week.  He's a big ole' 1 year old now. And I've been wanting to blog about all the things he's been doing.  Except he's quite an intensive child.  And so I don't get time to blog about him or anybody these days.  But here goes nothin'.....

Radiant. Observant. Gleeful. Energetic. Rascally.  

Nosy. Independent. Strong-willed. Bright.  

Fast-learner. Prankster. Adorable. 

My Little RJ

The beginning - Due July 31.  8 days late.  All my midwives felt and said, "Oh, he's little. 6 lbs, maybe 6.5."  So we waited for him, gave him time to grow.  5cm, 80% and no signs of labor at a week past.  What the heck.  A castor oil induction.  4 hours of labor, 45 minutes of pushing.  They were WRONG!  8lbs, 12oz.  21 inches long.  Wednesday, August 8th, 2012 at 4:07AM.  (Why are all my kids born in the middle of the night??)  

Came out into this world, looked up at me with his wrinkly little face and then promptly fell asleep in my hands as me, Daddy, our midwife and nurse dried him off, wrapped him up and counted his fingers and toes.  Fell asleep in my hands, you ask?  

Let me explain.  When I got to pushing, nothing was comfortable and I couldn't seem to lie down, although I had birthed the other 3 in a semi-sitting/lying position.  My wonderful midwife suggested (from her spot in her rocking chair, calmly knitting a blanket) getting on all fours on the bed and leaning on the birthing ball to take some pressure off.  I did this and one thing led to another and I was pushing (honestly what a better way to push than from that semi-sitting position!).  So when he was coming out, my midwife said, "Reach down, Mama, and catch your baby..."  And so I did.  And although ALL of my births were wonderful, special, enlightening and empowering... catching my little son myself was BY FAR a most amazing experience.  I think this is what made him so peaceful.  He just fell asleep right in my hands.  Not a single cry or squeak.  "What's wrong?" I said.  "Nothing," they said.  "Babies born peacefully and without intervention often don't cry... isn't it beautiful?"  But, alas, he would surely make up for this later.....!

Sleeping in my arms just seconds after birth.  

Still sleeping... 

After we're all cleaned up and checked over, we all rest together on the comfy bed at the Birth Center.  

 He is my "Never Baby."  I never had morning sickness before him.  Never had extremely low blood pressure in pregnancy before.  Never had a baby who wouldn't sleep lying down (he slept in his car seat or nap nanny for 5 months).  Never had a baby with thrush before.  Never had a baby that cried for months before. He yelled for 4 months.  Just cried.  Yelled.  Screamed.  From 4PM to 10PM on a pretty much nightly basis.  But slept... LONG. 4-6 hour naps.  And all the way through the night.  People said, "wake him up and feed him."   Ummm... no.  I like sleep too!! 

Meeting the fam.  We got home about noon on the day of his birth.  Riley isn't too sure what to make of this....

Indy is a natural...

Look!  He's not crying! 

 RJ liked to stand.  From the start.  At one month he would go in the exersaucer (while his core and head flopped on the side) and MARCH.  Just march.  March his little legs back and forth.  As he grew and got stronger, his little body went side to side as he marched daily.  He marched on people's legs, on the floor, anywhere someone would help him stand up.  When not marching, he'd put anything he could get in his mouth.  Sat up unassisted at 4 months.  Laughs at songs.  Loves Itsy Bitsy Spider and Wheels on the Bus.  

 

 Big boy sitting up 4 months  

           Sleeping it off

 

       Fist pump for Daddy     

     Serious about my driving!! 

     Hanging out in a cabinet that Daddy was building. 

Crawled at 6 months.  Crawled fast a week later.  Pulled up and cruised at 7 months.  Crashed a LOT.  Bumps, bruises, cuts.  Mostly on his head and face.  Stands, climbs.  So strong.  Hides things he shouldn't have behind his back if he sees you coming.  

                              Climbin the security bars at Bob & Mimi's store     

 The beginning of the end.... of my sanity... 

Makin a mess.

Started baby-led weaning at around 6-7 months.  He's gradually increased his food repertoire.  He gets our table food, not baby food.  And we do our best to eat real food, not the Standard American Diet of mac n' cheese, corn dogs and chicken nuggets. He eats nearly anything but especially loves Pears, Plums, Cantaloupe, Tomatoes, Potatoes, Pasta, CHEESE!, Watermelon, Tuna and Chicken.  LOVES  Bananas and will spit out or throw anything else nearby to get that banana.  

 
                Eatin'


                     Done. 


Pears, Ham, Tuna, Fiber Bread, Apricot, Tomato in hand


Walked at 9 months.  Ran a week later.  He's full speed ahead, all the time.  There's no "Slow" in RJ's vocab.  Started mimicking words and talking 8-10 months.  The first distinguishable thing he said was "a cup.. a cup!"  "Thank you" and "up" came next.   Closer to his birthday he's got "Mom Dad Indigo (but he says "IndigoIndigoIndigo" real fast) Down Up Uh-oh Cup Go Yeah Done."  He knows when to say them... mostly.  If I say "no" to something, he looks at me and says "yeah."   Wants to get down from a highchair or stroller?  "Down" and points to the floor.  Finished eating or when the car stops?  "Done."  He signs well, better than his sibs before him I think, he picks them up real fast.  He signs for eat, more, please, all done.  Loves... I mean LOVES all wires (with a strong preference for USB ends!), plugs, cars, loud noises, dresser drawer pulls that go up and down, laundry baskets with holes to poke little fingers through, spray foam, the Toilet, hangars, radios or other electronics with BUTTONS, balloons.  He is madly in love with my Dyson Ball Vacuum and talks to it, caresses it, follows it everywhere.  He's still nursing. :)  He's big and juicy from Mommy's milk.  I get complimented on his weight from the kind of people who are aware of just how beneficial breast milk is.  He loves his big sisters and brother.  He is a total ham.  He sneaks up the stairs ALL the time.  He moves the gates to get around them, then stops and puts them back.  He sneaks upstairs while I'm distracted and puts things in the toilet.  Repeatedly.  He can open the glass stereo cabinet door, turn on the stereo, hit the Source button until the radio comes on and then crank up the volume.  Repeatedly.  

Checking out the bridge after a storm 

Crankin up the outside tunes

 Falls asleep on siblings

Looking at the fishies 

We celebrated the littles' birthdays together, in between 7/7 and 8/8 (yes, those are Riley and RJ's actual birthdays), had family over for food and cake.  RJ really didn't have much of a clue, but he knew there was cake... 

Mom picked an awesome chocolate cake with bright blue icing.  

This was AFTER clean-up.... can you guess what the next day's diaper looked like?

Having fun on his real birthday even tho he still doesn't know what's going on.  

Taking a birthday bath

Out to the Farm for birthday ice cream

Other RJ randomness:  

Our yard is clearly at the bottom of the neighborhood hill. We are flooded when it rains.  Kids having a blast.  

Look at them thighs and calves!! 

RJ will sell you his "Marching With RJ" workout DVD for just $29.95 plus shipping... 

Trampoline fun with sibs and a cousin 

Mom gave me a piece of her Dyson.  I vacuumed all day long! 

I even got under the table, just like Mommy.  

Who made this mess?