But, as the story goes, I apparently suffered from Pogonophobia - in other words, I was afraid of beards and the people in them (mostly men, but you can never be too sure...).
I'm not sure how I survived, people, because it WAS the mid - 1980's, and men were covered in hairy mustaches and beards at every turn.
And, as you might guess as to where I'm going with this part of the story - the child psychologist for my school had a great, big beard and I guess that didn't fly with me. So I wasn't tested until a few years later, and subsequently accepted into the Gifted Program. In short, gifted was fun in elementary school, fun in middle school, and then they pull the plug out of the fun and call it things like "English Seminar" and just expect you to conform and join all the advanced placement classes. This also did not go over well with me, but that story is for another time. The only thing you need to have in mind when you read the remainder of this post, is that I was educated as a Gifted Child. Don't forget that, okay? It's entirely relevant.
At this point, Mom, my main reader and probably the one who accesses my page so often that it shoots my stats up in the triple digits per month, stop and relax a little! As my main advocate during my school-age years, you might think that I think that you made the wrong decisions, since I named this blog "My Gifted Education Failed Me...." Just keep reading, you'll see where I'm going. You did perfectly fine, and I wouldn't change it for anything!!
My Gifted Education failed me because...
It has taken me 5 days to realize NOT to drink my tea at night. Not just at night. As in, I make it right before I go upstairs to bed, and I drink it while sitting in bed.
Sounds relaxing, right?
A good idea, perhaps?
Not when you're 28 weeks pregnant and have a baby playing trampoline on your bladder.
No, sir.
This is NOT an intelligent choice at all.
At first I thought, No Big Deal. I'll drink one cup of tea, in a little bit I'll pee one time, then go to sleep for the night.
Let's remember, I'm one of the smart kids, right?
Remember now, this is NOT the first trimester where I'm getting up to pee all night. We've left that arena, and I have been sleeping through peacefully for many weeks now.
Before the tea decision, of course.
After the 5th night of insanity, I took to pencil and paper to figure this out. I needed to know the formula behind the variable "P," defined as the quantity of urine my body needed to put out in multiple trips to the toilet between the hours of 12 and 4 AM after consuming ONE cup of tea at bedtime. It seemed entirely impossible (not to mention amazing) to produce that much of "P" from just ONE cup!
Here's what I came up with:
So now, obviously, I've learned to drink my tea at dinnertime. Most nights, anyway.




























